Hello stranger! The build up to Christmas fast turning into Christmas and other time constraints have meant that I've been neglecting you of late. Since my last post Joshua has celebrated his 10th birthday where we went round for a few hours before I had to go to work. Also today is Louise's birthday, leaving only Nathan's just after Christmas. On top of the various celebrations Alison's 3rd CRB check of the year came through and she starts her placement this week on top of work and attending college. Time and money constraints nearly caused her drop out a couple of times but she has been persuaded to stay on. The fact that we would have still been billed for this term at least persuaded her to finish this term and then thought once she'd got that far she may as well continue as the college said they would only need to be paid in instalments after the grant application fell through and she is ineligible for a loan with it only being a part time course.
   The time taken to start the placement was also proving to be frustrating as she felt herself falling behind, although her tutor did say that she had passed her assignments so far. Tomorrow then sees her start her placement at Melanie's school and her tutor was rather relieved as well. I don't think she has had the heart to tell him that they break up on Friday for Christmas.
   On a totally unrelated note: After dropping Alison off at college I went for petrol only to hear a disturbance in the forecourt as the man in the van behind me got into an argument with someone else. Voices were quickly raised as they swore each other. I have no idea what it was about or who came from which car, although one called the other a bully and started chasing him. A young woman came across and shouted something herself whilst everybody else quietly tried to ignore them and fill their cars as quickly as possible. It was all a bit surreal for 9:30 in the morning - Off-road rage!

A busy weekend as yesterday saw Bethany turn 2 and some preparations and the actual party on Sunday filled our time in readily enough. An expensive week started with me being issued with a parking ticket after dropping Alison and Bethany off outside the library on my way to work. Rather than use the lift Alison needed a hand carrying the pushchair up he steps at the front of the building and I waited inside with Bethany whilst Alison got her books. After 5 minutes I came down the steps to see the traffic warden filling in the ticket as I was in a disabled area. My entreaties to her were fruitless as was the appeal to the council whose paraphrased reply was basically "We sympathise, but tough shit".
   I accept that I was in the wrong but the lack of parking and the extortionate prices charged for doing so does put me off using the town. Thanks to the internet I avoid it as much as I can and I'm surely not alone when people also have the option of using retail parks where the parking is free. As a result the town centre, along with many others, is suffering and I wondered if instead of halving the £70 fine if paid within a fortnight, they issued some sort of high street voucher for an equivalent discount that could then be used in local shops. I stress local shops as it defeats the object of helping small retailers if some large chain store is boosted by the scheme or even if it was spent on the weekly shop at the supermarket.
   As it happened we had to go into town on Saturday for a few items including some party balloons for Bethany. Alison had seen and was after some helium balloons with Happy Birthday on it and some princesses and one with the number 2 on. The first was no problem but that number was missing from those available but they did have one in the shape of a 2 which we handed over to be inflated, musing that it was twice the price due to the design.

It was actually bigger than Bethany but thankfully we still managed to fit it in the car along with all her presents the following day when we took them to the pub.
   I had hoped to have her birthday off at work but unfortunately that had already been taken so in a bit of a grump I took the rest of the week as a holiday. This meant that on the Sunday I still had to get up early for work so after returning home with Helen in tow I made my packed lunch and started assembling the toy kitchen that she had received from Helen. I managed to complete it in time for Bethany to have play with it before she went to bed and I gave Helen a lift home. When I got back home Alison was in the bath so I hung my coat up and prepared to go to bed. That was when I heard a tapping noise, but could not place it until I looked up and saw the big bulge in the ceiling, below the bath, where water was starting to drip down onto the plastic sheet by the front door. Slightly panicked I grabbed a bucket and phoned my dad who sensibly instructed me to turn the water off and said he would call round in the morning.
   I went to work but Alison phoned to keep me updated and said that my dad had taken the side panel off and there was a plumber coming at 2pm. I managed to put a half day in at work and got back to:

Apparently the waste pipe had been cross threaded and filled in with a load of silicone. The plumber fitted a new one and charged £40 which I was pleasantly relieved about especially as the damage was limited to that one area as well and should only need one piece of plasterboard to cover.
   I was going to go and spend more money whilst Alison and Bethany are out by making a start on some Christmas shopping but my cheque book and savings account book are no longer in my bedside drawer. Alison did mention a while back that given Bethany's penchant for opening them drawers and removing items from them, she thought it best to move them to a safe place. Unfortunately I do not know where that safe place is and after looking in the obvious and some not so obvious places I've given up on the shopping idea especially as I haven't received an answer back from the text enquiry I sent Alison. Easily dissuaded at the best of times I think I'll put the kettle on.

Small victories. The smug part of me had a mini ego massage this last week with various positive responses on Twitter. I had a couple of top 5 entries on the word game artwiculate indicated that some people thought my tweets were worthy enough to vote for and not just the sympathy vote generated for new players or the mutual retweet swap that can happen between some groups who follow each other. There is nothing wrong with that and I suppose it is simply repaying a compliment although I try to avoid it as much as I can but do occasionally fall into that trap. I feel that if I retweet because someone retweets me then that diminishes it's purpose and the recipient may feel (perhaps rightly) that there's is a guilt retweet. However, by only retweeting what I consider worthy then hopefully the recipient appreciates how much I rated their tweet. No doubt they probably think me rude for not wanting to vote for other's tweets so my own rate higher!
   The other pleasure comes from the general positive reaction I get from the #ffs I send. Rather than list a load of names that I recommend people follow I like to craft individual rhymes. These started as a general rhyme but has now progressed that I rhyme the actual account name with varying degrees of success. Those with a lot of numbers in their name are more problematic simply for the fact that there are only a few things you can rhyme 71 with without becoming repetitive. Rhyming the whole name also means that the end result may become somewhat clunky, or if a short two syllabled name, too obvious. A number of people have answered back to say how much they appreciated them, however, which is always a  nice reward and that someone glowed about theirs cheered me up no end. Again I fear if some think I may be fishing for compliments but the whole nature of ffs would make all who participate equally guilty and I like to think that I put a little more thought into them. As it happens, I sometimes give a little groan when I receive one myself as I feel obliged to come up with another rhyme in response - only more generic to thank them and offer them the compliment back in return. This I do as generally I may have sent them a rhyme previously and they are now responding in later weeks. If I have not sent them one previously then I will either do so if composed or simply thank them and add them to the to do list for the following week.
   To receive a glowing personal ff myself slightly embarrassed me but with a self indulgent bit of pride that someone took the trouble to write such nice things about me, no matter that not having met me had allowed them to overestimate my abilities. I do have a secret fear that certain people who are following me think I am  some sort of creative type who can actually write. Others participating in artwiculate are writing proper poetry in styles I have never heard of whilst I'm scribbling doggerel down with the odd classical reference I've picked up from reading Livy and Ovid. It surely can't be long before I am found out to be the fraud that I have always claimed I am, although being polite they will simply unfollow and quietly forget about me.
   I think it's safe to say that I have not found my target audience yet as it so far consists of people far too wordy themselves to require my services or simply not interested, preferring to use Twitter to flirt and repeat crap jokes. Still it's fun and not worrying about the whole poem thing means I can just mess around on there like everyone else.
  
   This last week has also seen Bethany continue to participate in domestic chores as she copies our behaviour and wants to take part. Aside from helping to empty the washing machine and carry the clothes to the airer, she has taken a liking to polishing the dining room and kitchen floor with the electrostatic mop which is light enough for her to push around the laminate. She did attempt to continue into the hall and living room but soon noticed the friction from the carpet stopped her in her tracks. She has also got into the habit of getting a tea towel out of the bottom drawer (which she can now open) when we start to wash the dishes and wants wet pots passing so that she can dry them. I try to restrict her to teaspoons although she fancies the look of the more breakable items. This often means washing an item, drying it and passing it to Bethany to 'dry' again before I open the cupboard door for her to put the item on the shelf, where I then stack it properly and close the door again to wash the next item. The dishes now take twice as long to clean.
   As a thought, this whole helping with the housework does last forever doesn't it?

I feel slightly shame faced to return to this blog after a couple of weeks of ignoring it after spending my limited spare time on Twitter. Here I am though, tail between my legs, slightly drunk with a feeling of obligation that I should write something. It was was never the intention of this blog to become a chore and I certainly don't mean to sound like it is only my own feeling of necessity to write something on a regular basis. What i should realise is that an informal blog is precisely that and I should post entries as and when I feel I have something to say, not because it's been a few days since my last post.
   For all that when I was regimentally keeping the 3 blogs going  was posting something every other day whereas now it is more like once a week. The quality is no doubt as crap as ever but I think if I have a point to make Twitter does offer the opportunity to express myself succinctly and timely on a subject after which I don't always feel the need to expand upon that point.
   Actual news, as always, centres around Bethany (that almost sounds resentful and it certainly is not meant to). Her climbing and vocabulary skills continue to progress apace with her keen to repeat as best she can phrases she has just heard. Returning to the ever popular 'Shuttle & Loom' yesterday, Bethany not only managed to climb to the top of the play area but had no difficulty negotiating the tube and climbed back down herself on a number of occasions. The added bonus came as I was leading her outside to play on the slide when the woman at the table stopped me to question whether I lived opposite. As it turned out they do live over the road from us and we were only just meeting after they had been where they are for 11 years and we have been here for 8. Alison, noticing something afoot, came over to establish more formal contact whilst I took Bethany outside. When we returned they were just leaving with their daughter (who Bethany had been playing with) and Alison filled me on what little she had gleaned. A commitment to go over with wine seemed to have been vaguely arranged with us happy to have met friendly neighbours in our age group. From what Alison related they remain sober during the week only to let their hair down at the weekend when job constraints are no longer pressing. This may mean me having to perfect another non-specific greeting suitable for acknowledging people I know and am on friendly terms with but don't quite yet consider a friend. The friend is easy as you say hello and talk as normal depending on how close a friend they are. Familiar faces that you don't know but see regular can be greeted with a simple nod of the head. This was taken to that uncomfortable middle ground at work the other day when passing a contractor who has been doing various bits of work for several months. As well as nodding as we passed we both opened our mouths as if to say hello but without actually saying anything, so that it appeared as if two goldfish were passing each other.
   I like to think that the air of polite detachment I use works so I shall stick with that until the situation deems it unnecessary and due for an upgrade.

   Another week passes and more damage is inflicted upon the house only this time not all of it is Bethany's fault. Rushing around last Sunday as I tidied before going to pick Alison up from work I wiped some crumbs from the wooden chopping board only for it to slip out of my hand as I turned to put it back. It caught the rounded edge on the front of the worktop taking a sliver out of the surface which cut through the board and embedded itself in the wood. Save for a small fragment that sliver glued back into place which is hardly professional but looks better than the exposed MDF or chipboard underneath.
   Not that Bethany hasn't been trying her utmost to redesign to her own specifications, mainly through the medium of crayon. The polystyrene style stones on the fireplace were brightened up with some pink crayon as well as the surround. While I applied Flash to the surround and sought help from Twitter for the 'stones' (WD40 apparently - although I've yet to try as the reverse had the graffiti so just left them for the time being) Bethany contiued her artwork by colouring in the screen on the television in the kitchen. Thankfully a damp cloth was all that was required to restore it to its usual condition.
   Her climbing continues apace and if you turn your back for the briefest of moments she will be on the dining room table and shuffling any papers you left there thinking that they were out of her way. Her
latest trick last night was to wedge a disc in the DVD player and as I stuck my fingers in to try and extract it to no avail she thought it funny to keep pressing the on/off button thus causing the drawer to open and close with my hand still inside and the cogs inside tickling my fingertips. After she went to bed I returned to the scene with a screwdriver and took the casing off allowing me to get the errant disc. It is working now but sounds a bit 'whirrier' than it did before. The remote control is still missing for it also.
   Bethany is also gaining more confidence climbing down as well as up when this morning she refused my hand and led herself down stairs using the banister for support until she got to the last few steps where the safety gate was in her path and she took my hand. Also in the play area at the Shuttle & Loom last week she managed to climb to the top but struggled to get back down. There were some other children playing in it who helped her down but she went back up later on and halted at a section of tubing where the floor was cut out and criss-crossed with straps. By this stage Alison had to retrieve her and we expected the same today but she crossed the straps no problem and paused at the perspex end of the tube to wave at us. She also managed to get down herself although Alison did have to go up a couple of times as the top level step was a little too high. She was about to hoist herself up that last step on one occasion when her ice cream came to the table. Telling her it was ready she understood and came down for her dessert, which she tried to share with us thus spilling chocolate ice cream down my front.
   Whilst her vocabulary continues to develop and she can repeat strings of words together she understands far more than you would expect from the still limited speech. I can thus ask her to put something in the bin or tidy something up and she will do so. If I put her shoes on and say we're going out she is standing by the door pointing at her coat and saying "coat" and "Let's Go". This morning round my parents she was trying to get out into the garden and using a padlock key on the door when my mam told her that "Grandad has the key, you'll have to see him". She duly went into the other room, brought my dad back and pointed at the door until he gave her the key from his pocket. We definitely need to stop swearing when we're not thinking. 

Quite an eventful sporting day that started with New Zealand lifting the Webb Ellis Cup as they were crowned rugby World champions. Commentators will have to find another topic to discuss now that they have rid themselves of the World Cup chokers monkey after edging past France 8-7 to win after that 24 year gap. That label will have hurt as they have been favourites a number of times and to have lost to a poor French side (who did play well in the final) would only have confirmed that status on home soil even without Dan Carter.
   Following England's exit a couple of weeks ago the captain Lewis Moody announced he was retiring from international rugby. At 33 he recognises that he won't be around for the next tournament and that England need to rebuild. His recent injury problems may have persuade him although a lot of players see these events as a good time to end their international careers if allowed that luxury. Moody has been a good servant for England as have a number of other veterans who may be considering their options before the decision is made for them.
   Most people in the UK will undoubtedly be talking about the Manchester derby where United were beaten 6-1 at home by City. Like United's 8-2 win over Arsenal earlier in the season it was one of those freak results that does not really reflect the difference in quality of the two teams but should serve as a wake up call to the red half (if they needed it) that they are still a long way fron challenging Barcelona. This sort of result has been coming with a drop off in recent performances with a number of key injuries impairing their defence in the main. The back four has not been stable yet this season and with a new goalkeeper not making the most confident of starts that has seen a once solid defence look vulnerable. At the start of the season Smalling and Jones looked solid and promising but they have been taking turns filling in at right back as Ferdinand and Vidic were accommodated back into the starting XI. That they are not yet match fit with Ferdinand in particular looking a shadow of his former self has not helped either.
   What was certainly shown up was Man United's lack of creativity from centre midfield which is what everybody knew from last season but which has not been addressed even after Scholes and Hargreaves left the club. Their dip in form has coincided with the loss of Tom Cleverley through injury who did look to provide a certain spark but whilst it is reassuring to see the faith placed in one so young rather than resort to the transfer window his absence has only highlighted the lack of depth that they have in that position. For all that City were good with David Silva in particular having a great start to the season. That, however, is the point of a league over a season as form dips in and out and it is how teams respond to the bad results which determines whether they are champion material or not.

A quick update on Bethany's progress in the past week. My parents got her some simple jigsaw puzzles; one set consisting of farmyard animals made up of two pieces and another of sea creatures. After being shown the two halves of an animal once she could then pair them off. In the case of the farmyard animals it even sounded like she called their names on assembly for cow, sheep and duck.
   Less positive is the big bruise and cut under her chin as she has a habit of tearing round the place with circuits of the table a particular favourite. Last evening whilst in the Brinkburn for Paul's birthday she was running round the table when the inevitable happened and she smacked her head off the side as she was distracted by everything else and no doubt getting a bit dizzy.
   It was not the first fall she had suffered and was soon rectified with a cuddle.

So the semi final line up for the Rugby World Cup is complete and does not include England. Yesterday's defeat against France was all the more disappointing as we never really competed save for a late surge after the damage had already been done. Typically as South Africa were knocked out this morning Peter De Villiers stood down as coach straight away where as for England Rob Andrew is going to conduct a report. Saying that I'm not sure if Martin Johnson should go or not which is probably as big an indictment of the team than any knee jerk reaction. Certainly the team underperformed and the coach takes responsibility for that especially as the team made more headlines off the pitch rather than on it. After a decent 6 Nations campaign the team appear to have gone backwards and what looked a good squad on paper have failed to deliver.
   The young, exciting players have not blended with the old guard who were supposed to lend an authoritarian air with the latter looking past it but still preferred to the youngsters in the pecking order. Hopefully the missed kicks of Wilkinson should not take the gloss of his career too much as we should build for he next tournament now without him as well as saying thanks and goodbye to Steve Thompson, Mike Tindall, Simon Shaw and probably Lewis Moody.
   For all that England's preparations were hardly helped by the usual shenanigans at the RFU with infighting leaving them without a permanent chairman, chief executive and performance director despite what acting head Martyn Thomas claims. A lack of leadership at the top filters down to a lack of leadership in the squad where a tour manager should have ensured the players behaved themselves during the down time. This all helps engender a lack of focus which if isolated may not have been a problem if the team were still performing on the pitch. However, England topped their group without looking particularly impressive and other excuses can be found such as Danny Care's injury or Courtney Lawes being banned for the first few matches these are the sort of mishaps that affect every team (New Zealand will no doubt more Dan Carter more than we the second choice scrum half). Similarly the theory that the midfield had not had time to gel as it was being constantly tinkered with is valid but not unique as France's player turnover can testify.
   France actually are reminiscent of England in the last tournament who got to the final despite themselves as the sheer force of will of the senior players dragged them into that showdown with South Africa where their limitations were exposed. Likewise despite Lievremont's eccentricities France have enough class to put a decent run together but can come unstuck at any time. You get the impression that Johnson was hoping for more of the same from England's class of 2011 but those old heads were 4 years older and his reliance on them and the use of forward play deprived the likes of Ashton and Foden from having much chance of running with the ball.
   One of the things that may save Johnson is if this is viewed as a work in progress and he may be allowed the opportunity to build the new team as the older players make way. The lack of any obvious replacement makes his position fairly secure as we prefer to appoint Englishmen and the RFU's obsession with Clive Woodward blinds them from any other potential candidates. As has oft been mentioned - the job that Shaun Edwards has done coaching the Welsh squad makes it a crime that England have not tried harder to recruit him to their coaching set up. All questions that Rob Andrew will surely address in his much anticipated review.


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   Bethany's speech development continues to progress as she has taken to repeating words we say to her when the mood suits her. Obviously some words are more distinct than others and when she is in a playful mood she'll point to an object wanting to know it's name and then repeating what was said. Her memory already seems better than mine as she now knows how to operate my parent's CD player after they demonstrated the sliding double door on the front of it to her. The other day she started playing with our traditional CD player and pressed eject after switching it on. I thought nothing of it at the time until yesterday when she had hold of a free CD that came with the paper. Noticing that she only had the sleeve I asked her what she had done with the disc only for her to point to the CD player and say "There". I replied "Yes, that's where it goes but where is it?" only for her to repeat herself. After a quick look and not seeing it I switched the CD player on and opened it up only to find the missing disc inside as she had told me.
   As if to emphasise the point, this morning round my parents whilst we were otherwise engaged we suddenly heard the song with her name start playing and noticed she had switched their CD player on and was dancing to her tune.

A unique case of a weekend seemingly lasting forever as I was not working overtime and Alison only had half days in the morning. We also crammed a lot into it as Margaret, Del, Diane and Tim came down to visit and we spent time catching up. Bethany enjoyed the extra company but still sought more and kept running up and down the stairs at Blackwell Grange and gatecrashing one of the 3 weddings that was going on at the time. She happily would wander into the disco, have a little dance and set off back down the stairs with whoever's turn it was to accompany her.
   On Saturday we had a barbecue at my parents as we made the most of the unseasonal October sunshine. This was followed by playing "Pin the Tail on the Donkey" which Helen had bought as a joke but which resulted in much hilarity with Tim failing to find the right wall from 6 feet away and Margaret's robot march as she swung her arms in alternative rigid fashion as she steered herself towards the target already becoming family legend.
   Yesterday saw us calling in to the Grange in town where Katie and Wayne were hosting a leaving do before emigrating to Australia. They had hired the pub from 2 to 10 and the place had been busy throughout as many came to say goodbye. Helen had been there since around 3pm as toasted her best friend and said our parents had called in about 5. We got there just after 7 and I had a "blast from the past" as I saw people I hadn't seen for nearly quarter of a century. At one point Helen mentioned seeing someone come in and the name didn't register and when she came back from chatting with her she mentioned she was with one of her sons. When they came over I recognized her immediately but the son was now a man in his 30s and a stubbly beard. I could tell it was still the boy we used to play with in the street we all lived in as children but had we passed in the street I would not have registered anything. As it was he had a few words of greeting with Katie's brother Stephen and was rather quiet. Myself being rather antisocial also kept my silence aside from when prompted by his father asking if I was Richard. After confirming he made a few pleasantries regarding Bethany and we went back to drinking our beers and let the women do the catching up.
   We left around 9 with Helen as we got a taxi back to Blackwell to call in and say goodbye to the Southern cousins who my parents were already with after dining with them. Saying goodbye Wayne seemed to get his second wind after the drinking games earlier had left him a little unsteady. He was taken with Bethany and was high fiving her as Helen and Katie said goodbye. Although as she is going to go round and see her before they depart it was not the big emotional farewell it might have been.
   I'm not sure if it was entirely our doing but not long after arriving at Blackwell and disturbing the peace of the convivial family group reminiscing as we barged in but another couple across the room left leaving us the room to ourselves. We weren't out too late but after the previous nights we all fell asleep on the couch when we got back but thankfully I have the week off to catch up on sleep and chores.
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The trial of Conrad Murray has just got underway and as I understand it the prosecution claim that he was negligent in his care of Michael Jackson and administered too much of the sedative Propofol whilst the defence claim that Jackson administered it himself when Murray was not there. Apparently this drug is only to be prescribed in hospitals and clinics so that Dr. Murray was in the wrong for allowing it into Jackson's home providing a basis for the negligence claim but I can see why he allowed it. Dr. Murray was being paid handsomely for his role as Michael Jackson's personal physician but when one of the most famous personalities on the planet demands a certain drug as that is the only one he feels happy with (if that is indeed the case) then it would be difficult to refuse. Other doctors may have already done so to the extent that he hires the first person who is willing to prescribe what he wants. This is not to condone any illegal activity only to demonstrate that the celebrities are not helping themselves and hopefully any people in a similar position will think twice about appeasing their famous employer with the potential consequences that may entail.


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   A success story of sorts as Bethany had her photo taken and laughed and smiled whilst doing so. They were taken at Joshua's school and Louise & Paul took Nathan along to get a family photo and invited Bethany as well to get one of all the children and we took the opportunity to get Bethany on her own as well. Unlike the last occasion at nursery where she cried the whole time, this time she was quite content - if not a little bemused at times. Credit should go to Joshua who she does playing with and he is also happy to be with his cousin. Kissing both Joshua and Nathan may start to give her a reputation which I might have to have words about. Nathan seems quite fond of the kissing lark and was doing his best to kiss Bethany when were all out for Anna's birthday and our anniversary last week. She obliged a few times but, like everything else, grew tired of that game and started clambering over the seats instead.

Bell harms any hat

No one seems to have taken the hint that this rampant capitalism lark doesn't seem to be in the best interests of the general public. After castigating bankers for putting the economy into meltdown, politicians have simply tutted and blamed each other for not regulating them enough before not regulating them. Like the 50p tax rate big business threaten to leave if they have to join in the "we're all in this together" malarkey so politicians run scared and mumble something about job creation as if they are wonderful philanthropists. In reality they employ as few people as possible for as little as they can get away with and want perks for doing so. Yes small businesses are a vital part of the economy but they are not the ones in a position to uproot anywhere as they often provide a local service, but big business try to squeeze these smaller companies thus removing any competition and effectively forming a cartel where they can demand what they want.
   This is the case with energy suppliers who have just been criticised by Chris Huhne at the Lib Dem conference in another example of "oh we didn't see that coming" where they have come up with confusing tariffs and make excessive profits from peoples unwillingness to shop around. This is always the argument put in favour of privatisation: competition will drive down prices. Now this may work in the manufacturing sector where you have a product which people want to buy but another company is selling one slightly cheaper although it may not be as good quality. Different companies will have differing overheads and their size may make them more or less efficient and as a consumer we do have the choice about which we would prefer. This is slowly being eroded by efficiency gonks who believe that each company should strive to make Product A as cheaply as possible which may mean sidelining it for the slightly different but easier to produce generic Product Z. The trouble is as every company does this we are left with a sea of the same generic product at some cheap price after they have all undercut each other but no Product A or even B and C which the public actually quite liked.
   With the energy companies the "product" is the same. The quality of the electricity or gas is no different no matter who supplies it and what I've found when shopping around is they ask me what I pay then say "Well if you pay that to us". Really? You want me to fanny around switching suppliers just so I can give the same (or slightly less at a push) amount to you. Then in a couple of months time British Gas or n-power will announce they are putting bills up 16% and within a couple of months the others will have followed suit.
   This problem arises with most of the companies that were privatised in the 80s which supplied your household needs. Energy and water are essentials for every household and people don't have the time or inclination to wade through the various tariffs available. Telephones are the exception in that they now have ab accompanying product to pitch but again the various tariff rates on offer make a maths degree essential when shopping around.
   Letting these companies grow in a deregulated fashion and then scratching your head wondering why they seem a bit greedy is pathetic and asking them not to do it again just weedy. Self regulation will never work and if any of these politicians are serious about addressing the imbalances in society then they have to start acting.
Parish Notices:
   Alison started college today and is now the proud owner of a student card, but the extra placements she needs to do the course and the overtime stopping at work mean things could be a bit tight for a while. Bethany is developing an ever increasing fondness for our bed to the extent where she won't go down in the cot and we have to wait for her to fall asleep in our bed before transferring her over. Oddly we don't have to be in the bed with her: she just likes our bed.

May enthrall bash

This past week has seen what appears to be Bethany stringing words together to form sentences with the most pronounced phrase being "I don't want to". 21 months old and already showing defiance with her first utterances but the pride in hearing her say that far outweighed the frustration at trying to get her into the bath at the time. It was her reply to me as she ran around the spare room in her nappy when I asked if she wanted to go in the bath only for her to indicate that she preferred to climb over the futon.

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Good as it is that England have won the One Day series against India with one game to go it should not lead to assumptions that we are now a force in this form of the game as we may have beaten the World Champions but they are a depleted, demoralized and unlucky version of the team that won on the sub continent in Spring. Whilst England chose to rest Pietersen and have since lost Morgan and Broad through injury India are without Tendulkar, Sehwag and Zaheer Khan and after a long tour where they were outplayed in the test series. The last ODI highlighted the close nature of the contest with Duckworth Lewis determining a rain affected match to be a tie with only 7 balls left and England requiring 10 with their last effective wicket. This is not to suggest that England have not played well but there have been times when after getting good starts they  have relaxed and let India get back into the game which a more experienced and streetwise team may not have done.
   As things stand India have still to win an international match on English soil this year and for such a highly ranked team this is more a reflection on their failings than on England's brilliance. Certainly England are a good Test team but it is far too early for some of the superlatives being bandied around and  tough matches away from home may give a truer picture of their quality.

Haybarns tall hem

These posts are getting more sporadic as overtime eats into my spare hours and Twitter is getting increasingly addictive to the point where I don't think I actually watched any TV last week until Saturday evening. Bethany seems quite hyperactive at the moment as she tries to burn off excess energy but is finding and exploring new things all the time with an enthusiasm that I am jealous off.

   To keep the youthful(ish) passion thing going Alison has enrolled at the college for a course in Youth Services which should start later this month. There is only the small matter of a large form regarding the finances to sort out along with Alison having already arranged some placements. Tomorrow night now.

Many harsh ballet

I remembered something that I had intended to report previously re my last posting. Nothing over extraordinary only that the last couple of occasions that Bethany has been to nursery they have started to integrate her into the older section for children over 2. So far they have taken her over for an hour at a time to get her used to what will be her new surroundings in a couple of months and when they first told us it was one of those realization moments that she is no longer a baby. She is of course still very young and you hear people constantly comment about how they grow up so fast but dismiss this as fanciful as time grinds it inexorable way forward. There is the perception that as you grow older you have more time to reflect back on than when you were younger so that childhood memory when you were 10 seems like yesterday when you were 15 and also when 35 but the 20 year gap makes the reflection feel almost like time has somehow contracted. Anyway she does seem to be growing up quickly but again children tend to have quite a rapid rate of growth as my arms can testify when she gets tired of walking and wants carrying.

   This she did this afternoon after subtly indicating that she wanted to go out by putting her wellies on, pointing at her coat and standing by the front door. After waiting for the rain to ease off I took her out believing some fresh air and a run in the park was what she was after. We managed to walk around the corner before she started to cry, wanting to picked up which I complied with thinking it for the best by the road side and thought to put her back down in the park. Once in the park she did not want putting down and pointed back at the gates to leave. Our short lived excursion was over with only a small detour to the shop for some wine and a magazine for Bethany before we went back home.

   Speaking of which - time for a top up: Later.

Thrale balsa hymn

I keep getting sidetracked with one thing or another and with the developing news stories at the moment giving the lie to the summer being a quiet news season that is proving harder to stay focused than normal. I hoped to use this blog to chart Bethany's development amongst other things and, naturally enough, I found myself commenting on other things which is why I tried setting up other blogs to demarcate various topics but time constraints meant that it was unfeasible to continue like this and I no longer blog solely on here as often as I used to with overtime and Twitter bleeding into the quotidian household stuff.

   The upshot of this is that after noting something that I deem worth mention on here it may be a few days before I get around to posting anything by which time I have forgotten what it was I intended to write. Shifts ensure that I don't set aside a specific time in the evening when I type up the days occurrences and such a system is not always practical as e.g. Bethany may need something, I don't make notes of anything as it does not seem that important and to be honest I may have forgotten the incident by the evening anyway.

   In the back of my mind I know there was something that Bethany did that I thought deserved mention but all I can recall was of her playing outside last night with us and Helen who came round for tea. She was particularly pleased with herself whenever she kicked a ball off the decking and came to me for a high five. This was something I had jokingly shown her the week before but had not repeated it since so was quite surprised that she had remembered it. Her memory is certainly better than mine appears to be as she demonstrated on a couple of occasions earlier in the day. At my parents she was running around one of my dad's many sheds when she patted a tree stump as she circled which my dad informed had been the game she played a few weeks ago. She also outsmarted my mam who double backed to catch her coming round but Bethany had done the same and surprised my mother by coming up behind her.

   She also went to their midi hifi and opened it up remembering where the eject button was. After rejecting a number of CDs to play she picked the one that had been in there in the first place (without knowing what it was) and went to press the play button demonstrating a greater knowledge of the CD player than my father who was less sure as to the button's location.

   As is the way of things I will no doubt remember whatever incident I intended to report in a couple of hours, but Bethany will be back from nursery, I'll be trying to get ready for work and events in Libya will most likely be coming to a conclusion making anything else redundant as the news again interferes.

Ha, ran sly meth lab

Time constraints have meant that I have been a bit tardy of late on this blog and as such certain things I may have intended to write may not be quite so current but instead afford for some reflection after things have died down. Specifically the recent riots have seen plenty of column inches and items on news programmes filled with enough conjecture as to the reasons behind the disturbances but without any definitive answers. Now, in the aftermath, the human cost of those affected becomes more palpable as the reporting dies down a little but people are left to pick up the pieces of the damage caused whilst in an attempt to appear to act tough, but in reality making up for being slow to react, politicians seem to be making examples of those found guilty.

    Whilst not seeking to condone the actions of those involved, some of the sentences that have been passed have been completely disproportionate to the crimes committed. In particular the two men given 4 year sentences for incitement after posting on Facebook encouraging people to meet and start a riot. Whilst they are idiots and the fact that nobody followed their advice should give some clue as to how dangerous they actually are making the punishment an example. They themselves were not prosecuted for causing any harm or damage and the freedom of speech, no matter how unpleasant, must take precedence in a civil rights issue.If we don't let people say things we don't like then you stifle debate and the really dangerous types go underground. As it stands the likes of Nick Griffin and the EDL can say their ridiculous things and we can point and laugh at them.

  Similarly harsh is the case of a man given 16 months for helping himself to some donuts in the melee, which is all well and good as a symbol of not standing for the riots but where were the similar stands against bankers and MPs who were equally guilty of institutionalised criminality and it will be interesting to see the sorts of sentences that get handed down to journalists guilty of phone hacking. Talk of withdrawing benefits of those found guilty also acts as a double punishment and assumes that all guilty parties are on benefits. This was not the case and this would mean that poorer people would then be dealt worse than someone not relying on benefits. Aside from that if you withdraw housing and money from people already struggling and in desperate straits then you are only going to exacerbate tensions by making them worse off.

   One thing that it has done is kick into touch the idea amongst the few that we were somehow different and more refined than other nations. News of atrocities in foreign civil wars are easily brushed aside as being so far away as not to be any concern of ours and that they can not be as civilized as us. Whilst the riots were in no way comparable to tribal warfare it does lift a lid on the human psyche and what perfectly civilized people are capable of when caught up in the moment.

   On a lighter note the England cricket team are now rated number 1 in the world (actually the best of just over half a dozen teams) and the realization that they are actually quite good. It does not seem so long ago that Jimmy Anderson was only good for carrying the drinks out on tour and is now ranked behind Dale Steyn in the fast bowler stakes. I still think there is room for improvement as Eoin Morgan has yet to convince at 6 with my preference still being for someone who can bowl to take the pressure of the 4 man attack. Granted he got a century in his last innings but he was lucky to be dropped a couple of times and he was facing a demoralized Indian attack at the time. Ironically the man most likely to replace him and who fits my bowl a few overs bill would be Ravi Bopara who failed in the same innings.

Harm by Thanes

So then Part II and all that of holiday goings on. I'll try and keep things short and sweet as it's Saturday night and I can at least pretend that I have better things to do. The pluses and minuses of the holiday can easily be categorized by whether or not Bethany enjoyed the experience for convenience sake with a third category of partial enjoyment which may safely be assumed that if we are relying on our daughter to judge probably means that we were not overly impressed. The first excursion involved going to Thrigby Hall which we thought would be a winner with the zoo knowing how much Bethany enjoys interacting with all animals. We and her were not disappointed with the crocodiles / alligators and big cats providing especial wonder for Bethany but we still felt slightly uncomfortable seeing such magnificent beasts in captivity.

The broads were a popular destination with an initial trip to Potter Heigham followed by my rekindling of old memories by venturing to Wroxham where as a student we had been to before and had hired a boat from to cruise the broads. Twenty years later and I did not recognize the place but the presence of Roy on the front of every other shop told me that I was in the right place place and that his grip on the local retail market was as strong as ever. Two further trips did nothing to rekindle old memories as we went back to take a boat cruise which Bethany (and therefore us) enjoyed and also the following day to take a trip on the narrow gauge railway that runs between Wroxham and Aylsham.

   This latter train journey can be filed in the fail column as we had called in the previous day before we got on the boat and realized that we did not have time for both so picked the water option as it was getting late and the last boat journey was the only 1 hour trip of the day which we thought best so as not to have Bethany confined for so long but found out that the train journey was 45 minutes. Once we were on the train overhearing a family behind us we soon discovered that it was 45 minutes each way. Added to that most of the scenery consisted of hedgerows and given the timescale we were obliged to have lunch at the cafe at Aylsham station in the half hour wait for the return journey after having already spent twice as much on tickets as we had for the boat (I was already mildly irked by having my vouchers declined as I had remembered them too late and he had rung it through the till but before I had paid). Too make matters worse Bethany was due a sleep after her lunch, being tired and howled for about 5 solid minutes (it felt much longer but that is probably more accurate) before she finally went to sleep causing us to apologize to the rest of the carriage. The other passengers were fine but I could definitely detect the smiles on one older couple who started admiring Bethany become more rigid as they tried to sympathise as she screamed her way through Norfolk. This relaxed once more when she did fall asleep and another couple also became friendlier as they told us not to worry in response to our apology saying that they had been there themselves.

   The added bonus of these trips to the broads was finding some nice country pubs for lunch on the way which were always welcoming with good food and real ale. In the case of our last full day it proved to be the highlight of the day after the morning train journey and a trip to Norwich after lunch. The pub on the road between Wroxham and Norwich even had a guitarist and another customer who came in after us got up and sang along. This separated my second slice of nostalgia with the trip to Norwich but we only looked around the city centre where we grabbed a few souvenirs as presents and aimlessly wandered without any real purpose. Alison did comment that a pub we passed on the way in looks nice only for me to recognize "The Artichoke" as a pub I had frequented a few times as a student as friends lived nearby but remembered as not the best in the city and not unknown for drug deals to take place therein. It may well have improved since then but it would not have been my first choice had we called in for a drink anywhere.

   Another mixed bag was Fritton Park which the tourist brochure led us to believe contained a farm as well as children's adventure park and soft play area. There was no farm but a pony riding area and duck decoy which Bethany again was happy to say hello to as well as the soft play area which she played in for a while as well as a go on the slide. However we walked around the rest of the estate which was fine enough but there was not quite enough for children of Bethany's age to do. She certainly was too young for golf and we did not relish going on the boating lake with her but looked forward to utilizing our free carousel ride vouchers that we were given on the way in. There was a queue for the carousel when we arrived so thought to have a go after walking round. When we got back to the starting point near the carousel it was running so again we decided to check out the ponies behind it, but by the time we came back it had shut for half an hour so just left.

   So as to actually feel seasideish we did do the usual holiday stuff in Great Yarmouth on a couple of occasions (amusements, walk down the piers) and took the local car train as well as calling back in after the boat to check out the nightlife on the pier as Alison wished to size up the entertainment which turned out to be non existent. The following night we could have seen Cannon and Ball had we so wished but for that evening, nada. Still it was better than being at work.

The marsh banally

We're back from our week long holiday, tired and not so hungry anymore after nipping out to the nearest gastropub. Whilst the weather was warm it was disappointing that the sun cream remained unopened and we spent the grand total of about half an hour on the beach at Great Yarmouth with a handful of other hardy souls who at least prepared better with a windbreaker or in one case flew a kite. We made the token gesture of tipping our toes in the sea and built a few sandcastles with Bethany before going for lunch.

   The campsite itself left us a little underwhelmed, not that there was anything wrong with it, only it was a lot larger than the John Fowler site in Ilfracombe we were at last year and it felt slightly impersonal. A number of other factors may have contributed to this as well as the Entertainment team not being able to spend as much time with the customers and Alison did point out that it was peak season so there were more school age children there as opposed to toddlers and pre teens who outnumbered teenagers in Ilfracombe. The "Showbar" was also dark and loud which Bethany found discomfiting and did not dance along as she had previously. The other bar contained the restaurant and TVs and tended to be a mix of teenagers playing on the pool tables and the parents relaxing having shook them off for a moment. That's not to say that there were no other toddlers only each family unit was busy doing there own thing with one eye on their own kids all the time.

   Ironically the last night we went for a meal in a nearby pub we had noticed and got on well with another family who had two young boys, the elder (2.5ish) of whom spent most of the night running around the pub with Bethany. After chasing each other all night he also guarded from going outside to the smoking area as she had taken off her shoes and when his mother called him to come back as they were going she mentioned about  not letting her outside and he led her back holding hands. He even gave her a goodbye kiss much to all our amusement and jokes of a holiday romance making it quite a pleasant night spoilt only by my gammon being burned to a crisp.

   That evening felt more relaxed being out of the camp environment which did give that surreal prison feel at times not mitigated by it being a forest based site but yet stuck in the middle of a housing estate and having to show our passes to get back in after 6pm. This early curfew almost made me feel guilty about going out for the day which may have been the idea.

    I may save the joys of trips out for another day as it is getting on and I just want to sit down and vegetate / fall asleep on the couch.

Than by hall smear

The packing is almost done, the satnav ready with directions printed off to sneer at the satnav and sandwiches made for the journey. According to the map directions the journey time to Great Yarmouth is 5 hours which seems rather excessive as I'm sure it took me about 3 and a half to Norwich and it's only about 30 minutes further. Still that was nearly 20 years ago and there may well be more tractors about when I hit East Anglia.

   Further preparations have also seen me being dragged into the 21st century and get a smartphone on contract. Having only ever had hand me down pay as you go phones "in case of emergency" I thought it time to bite the bullet as there was a good offer on tying in with our landline. The wife was so impressed that she wanted one as well and seemed pleased when I told her I could have 3 accounts. Sure enough a couple of days later we walked out of the Virgin store with his and hers Blackberrys and after charging Alison's overnight she was piqued to discover hers not working. Wanting Bethany and myself out of the way whilst she awaited the hairdresser I walked into town and addressed the problem back at the store. I had noticed that the SIM card appeared to be damaged and they agreed but said that I had to phone the helpline in order to get a new one sent out. Leaving the store slightly bemused I called them on my phone but we seemed to confuse each other and it appeared to be a massive problem that I could not give her the phone number as the SIM card was faulty.

   The result was that I had one hand tied up on the phone whilst trying to take the SIM card out of Alison's phone with the other hand, dodging the showers in the entrance to the shopping mall whilst Bethany was starting to get fractious as we had not moved for a while and I was struggling to understand the woman on the other end of the phone due to a combination of a poor reception and a strong South African accent. We agreed that it was best if I ring back on the landline when I got home as I could not read my phone number to her at the same time as talking to her as the phone was new to me and she said that she would register the fault with the technical department with whom, it seemed to me, she wanted to transfer me to.

   When I did call later on I gave them the code number on the SIM card and after a few personal details they said they would send a new one out. Simple as that but, unfortunately for Alison, it is due to arrive after we have left.

   Frustrated by that encounter with a phone company I set out for another as Alison wanted to keep her old number meaning that she had to ask her current provider for a PAC number that could then be passed to Virgin. Seeing the Vodafone store over the road I thought to call in, get the number and when I called Virgin to re-report the fault give them the number - two birds and all that. Sure enough the store is nothing more than a 3D catalogue and was told that I would have to phone up for the number making me wonder what the point of the stores are.

   As Alison did not have enough credit on her phone I called from my Vodafone pay as you go to use up the credit hoping it did not confuse them. Again simply enough they said they would text the PAC number to Alison's phone and it should be about 30 minutes. After waiting longer I could not put off the call to Virgin any more and we are still waiting for the text the following day. Something to sort out when we return as there is little to do without the SIM card anyway.

   To cap it all Alison's hairdresser did not turn up. Christ I'm looking forward to this holiday.

Shan't rely lab ham

One of those regrettably ever rarer moments of good sportsmanship yesterday after MS Dhoni withdrew India's appeal against Ian Bell's wicket over tea after he was controversially run out from the last ball before the break. Bell was foolish to presume that the ball had gone for 4 and therefore dead as he prematurely walked off for the tea interval but it felt cynical and opportunistic to remove the bails as he did so. Hopefully the 22 extra rums he scored in the evening session before being dismissed do not make much difference to the result of the match.

   Further proof that I am not cut out for the world of business comes from the Twitter account that I set up to promote the Design a Rhyme website. Thinking that I would use it to advertise my wares as it were I've let myself down by not pushing it either. Looking at other accounts to see others with 1000 followers but following the same number just to boost their presumed popularity I then realise that I should be trying this tactic as I'm not trying to win friends but to make more people aware of my website. I've slowly started to increase the number of people I follow but again in no targeted way as it feels rude to follow someone I have no particular interest in and so follow similarly minded people who appear more literate and funnier than I am and would therefore be more than capable of composing their own poems should they so wish. To pester others would feel like spamming and I would not like to receive it myself so refuse to do so.

   I keep telling myself that as it's only a hobby and not receiving any orders is no biggie but after a couple of months of web silence it would be nice to receive another commission if only to keep my hand in.

He'll nab smart hay

Bethany's current favourite phrase is "Whatsthat?" which she repeatedly pronounces whilst pointing at the object in question awaiting an answer. However endearing this was initially soon became tiresome on our part although we try our best to humour her through gritted teeth. I like to encourage her curiosity and when she opened a book at a cartoon of various animals she repeatedly asked me what they were the other day, To amuse myself as well as her after the third or fourth time of announcing "That's a turkey" or "That's a sheep" I thought I would spice things up by providing the relevant barnyard noise to accompany their name. Clucks, honks and baas were all well and good but rather than going "oink, oink" when she pointed to the pig I preferred to actually snort. Unfortunately for me, Bethany took a particular liking to this impression and continued to repeatedly point at the pig to hear me snort much to the detriment of the back of my throat.

   Currently we are now counting down until we go away next week with Alison sorting her wardrobe out selecting clothes and I may try and buy some more T-shirts before we go although to not be at work will be a break enough at the moment. Rather than book all my holidays out I tend to keep going until I get fed up and take a week off excepting whatever fortnight is available in the summer and time off around our birthdays. Excepting the odd day for when we went to Reading it's been a couple of months since any significant time off so I'm relishing the chance to catch up at home and relax before setting off down Norfolk.

Samantha be Rhyll

Rather a depressing weekend with events in Norway and Amy Winehouse's death dominating, which if nothing else may have provided relief to Rupert Murdoch for taking News International of the front pages. Being at work when both incidents occurred provided for an even more confusing image of what was happening as rumour and updates were second hand at best and coming from sources that were not sure of the situation. In the case of the Norwegian attacks the talk was of terrorist attacks with people immediately jumping to conclusions and blaming Islamic fundamentalists with radio hosts still looking for reasons why they may be a target in the evening on my way home. I wondered about the claims that these were Al Qaeda tactics with the bomb falling in this category but the shootings sounded more reminiscent of somebody with a grudge like an upset teenager in an American high school. Reasons that Norway may be targeted were suggested but seemed vague even when it was announced the culprit had been arrested and was said to be a Norwegian national with eye witnesses describing him as white and blonde. This was not enough for certain media outlets such as The Sun who blamed Al Qaeda on their front page the next day.

   All the details are still not yet in but from what has so far emerged is that the attacker was a far right extremist that took his dislike of multi culturalism to shoot predominately white people.

   The death of Amy Winehouse has created more talk of the 27 club as if it were a curse rather than what started as a coincidence and has become a cult. It is probably the case that more musicians have died at the age of 75 but do not have the iconic status from having died young for it to be commented upon. As it happens those that do die young will do so for a number of reasons but predominately the artists often quoted have some sort of inner demon or being young and rich over indulge in their addiction of choice for a few years before it takes its toll.

   Again it is too soon for Amy Winehouse's cause of death to be announced with early reports of an overdose of ecstasy as yet unconfirmed but the shock of this tragedy is also accompanied by a sense of not being very surprised. This somehow makes it feel a bit worse as you wonder if anything could have been done to prevent her death.

Learn maths by HAL

   Bethany continues to show glimpses of her improving development which can surprise as it easy to assume that her mental abilities are linked to her speech abilities. Just because she only knows a few words does not mean that she does not understand what we are saying. The clues have been around, such as her responding when you call her name now even though she can't say it but I was given a further demonstration yesterday when reading her book of first words. She can identify one or two items (namely ball and choo-choo train) and responds to some other words such as when I say "Flower" at the relevant picture she puts her hand to her hair remembering that when walking in the park she likes to pick the daisies and put them in her hair. At first I took little regard of this gesture but she does it most times and only with flower. Yesterday, however, instead of getting her to name the item I reversed the procedure and got her to point to the relevant picture when I called it's name in the index at the back. Here she pointed to over half of the pictures correctly with some added bonuses eg pointing to her own socks as well as the picture of them.
   She does continue to like organizing things and thee nursery report on her predilection for arranging items on the table and putting them back. Whilst at home tidiness is not part of the procedure she does like to place things in certain places including myself. Yesterday she insisted that I sit in a certain seat and was not happy if I moved, even to get my coffee when in the same room. She heard me move when she was not in the same room and shouted her disapproval so I went back before she reentered the room. She did let me get up to make meals and her concentration may be distracted enough from time to time so that I was free to get up now and again but that was often if I got up to play with her or she would cry at me to get her more juice. A lot of her playing involves climbing and whether it is onto the dining room table or the window sill each time we carry her back down she laughs and starts again.

Thermally ban ash

I was thinking of passing a comment on the News International furore but events continue to develop at such a pace that by the time I clicked "Publish Post" it would be outdated. As of this moment Rebekah Brooks has resigned from her post which would have meant that had I posted a piece yesterday commenting on her position being untenable then I would have been blatantly prescient and out of date by now. Being an intermittent blogger it is probably best to wait and see how the story develops further with appearances by Brooks and the Murdochs before a Commons select committee due next week for starters.
   Most of this week Alison has been trying to organize a 40th birthday party for myself with a little assistance from Helen to the frustration of all. That frustration stems from me not really wanting to acknowledge the fact several months away and being the anti-social sort who shies away from large gatherings. Ideally going for a meal with close friends and family or going away for a few days would be more suitable but doesn't particularly cater for the younger ones. My stipulations are - not too large, informal and with a supply of real ale but I feel torn about saying I might not want certain people there and feeling obliged to please. Reasons for refusal are nothing personal but it gets into friends of friends territory and I feel cheeky inviting people I vaguely know as I think it gives the impression of "I don't really know you but come to my party anyway because I want a present".
   Part of me actually thinks it would be a good idea to make it for the kids: jelly and ice cream, pass the parcel etc and just get slowly drunk in the corner. It may be more fun. Oh well only seven months to go.

Them anally brash

Tired after getting in late as we drove back from near Reading where we were celebrating Margaret and Del's 60th Wedding Anniversary. We were all feeling a little the worse for wear this morning but somehow managed to rouse ourselves to breakfast after getting our revenge on Bethany by getting her up for a change. It was the first time many of our southern relatives had met Bethany and after her initial wariness she enjoyed herself and actually fell asleep in Margaret's arms during the dance in the hall. She happily slept through the rest of the evening until we returned to the hotel where she woke back up and, feeling recharged, got her second wind and played until we staggered out of the bar around 3am after catching up. Diane and Tim's daughters happily entertained her along with Emily's boyfriend who may have found the whole experience a touch unusual after he was constantly being picked on by the MC leading the dancing with instructions and asking for "Ben, get up here" or "Where's Ben" and even "This one's easy. Even Ben could manage it" often for Ben to decide the time was ripe to sneak out of the hall for a cigarette.
   Not feeling ready for the long drive home after checking out at 11am it was nice to be invited to Margaret and Del's for a barbecue with most of the rest of the family. We killed some time in my parent's room, who are stopping an extra night before visiting Steph whilst in the area, where I basically sat slumped in a chair for an hour. At the barbecue the usual Margaret teasing took place but with the underlying warmth and concern over her recent fall which left her with a broken jaw on Friday. After noting that she fell in Asda we wondered if it had been in the wine aisle and her response to my mother's suggestion of having soup because she had  barely eaten for two days unable to chew was that it was the wrong time of year for soup.
   As well as their first meeting with Bethany we met an even newer addition to the family in Evie May. Helen and parents saw her when she was only a few weeks old when they came down for Margaret's 80th birthday a couple of months ago but Alison and myself saw her for the first time and realized it did not seem so long since Bethany was that cute.
   As is the way of these occasions we did not end up leaving until about 4:30pm knowing that it would be at least 5 hours before we got home. Already knowing from the journey down that we would have to go the longer route as the A43 had been closed for the British Grand Prix at Silverstone we eventually got away but the first half of the journey seemed to take forever with roadworks and heavy traffic delaying us further. I had to stop after 60 miles for petrol and much against my initial hope we had to stop again before we passed the half way point as Bethany was really upset. By this time it was after 7:30 pm and she was hungry and tired so I stopped at the next available services (Donnington Park) which were nearly half way home. After some food a couple of nappy changes and a bit of a run on some grass we set back off with Alison sitting next to Bethany in the back, the better to attend to her whilst she finished her food and we did the last stretch in one go with Bethany falling asleep a little later on. Hopefully the whole weekend has not messed her up too much and we have another long journey to look forward to in a few weeks when we go to Norfolk on holiday. At least the return leg won't be until a week after the outward bound drive.

Thresh banal amyl

Typically I suspended my news and sport blogs at a time when there was much to discuss. After mentioning Johann Hari and the pillorying he was receiving from certain sections of the media that has paled compared to the phone hacking scandal that has erupted. The editor at the time, Rebekah Wade, has so far refused to stand down which is ironic given how quick to call for heads over less important matters her and her ilk have been in the past. Almost as ironic is the call from the private investigator at the centre of the scandal, Glenn Mulcaire, asking for the privacy of his family to be respected as he gets doorstepped. It is still early days but my initial feeling that people would tut for a few days is thankfully looking not to be the case as the public mood is turning angry and advertisers pull out from the News of the World. The true test will be at the weekend to see how their circulation is affected and if this recovers the following Sunday.
   Sportingly since my last post on Sports Thoughts Wimbledon has been and gone (Djokovic won), Haye was beaten by Klitschko and the Women's Football World Cup has started and England topped their group but I have nothing further to add that has not already been said.
   That leaves the least interesting thing to write about which is me and I finally bit the bullet and took my car to the garage to investigate the light that appeared on the dashboard a few weeks ago. When it first appeared I referred to the manual which informed me that it was the "Indicator Fault Light". This seemed a little precise to have a warning light telling me one of my indicators was on the blink (or not) and on closer reading I discovered that it was somewhat vaguer and meant that this light indicated there was a fault. Elsewhere in the manual I was provided with the clue that the fault may be with the exhaust or catalytic converter and I baulked at the prospect of a bill for a few hundred pounds for a whole new exhaust system. With a drive to Reading at the weekend I thought it best to get it seen to and had it booked in for yesterday. At the garage the mechanic performed his diagnosis and informed me that the lambda sensor was not working. As if my blank face was not clue enough as to what that was he proceeded to demonstrate before and after graphs of emission graphs with hand signals which did not really help only that instead of spikes I had a sort of flattened, angular sine curve. I enquired about the only thing I was concerned about which was "How much?" and "How long?" and half an hour later and £140 lighter I left with no discernible difference to my car save for that light not being on any more. If they weren't a garage that I have used before and trust he could have simply taken the bulb out of the dashboard for all I know.
   Sort of progress on the supervisors position at work where I believe three others applied along with myself. With management cover being stretched on some of the weekend overtime where not everyone is available I was asked by my manager if I wanted to train in the office next week to provide extra cover should the need arise. Apparently this had been cleared higher up and can only help my case if they ever get around to making an appointment if I have already done a bit of the job. Curiously the supervisor whose personal circumstances was making it difficult to do certain shifts and for whom the vacancy was to temporarily replace claimed that he could work the problematic weekend after all. I am therefore hoping that the supervisor training is not considered unnecessary and that was not the feeling I got with my manager still keen to have more people trained up.

All her mynahs bat.

   A late night for Bethany as we were at Helen's for her birthday barbecue and most of her other guests all had children too resulting in a frenzied evening with all ages upto about 9 running around. Fiona and Adrian are up for the weekend so there was a face Bethany recognized in Emily and after an initial 10 to 15 minutes of being very quiet and not wanting to move from my lap she soon came into her own as more children arrived and she started to run around with them. Emily took her under her wing and endearingly continues to refer to her as Baby Bethany.
    She happily would run inside to the front door before coming back and running to the end of the patio, where a little wall separates the raised garden, and sit on the wall until after a repeating this several times she decided to climb the wall and run around on the grass. This process of constantly assessing the situation before deciding she can overcome the hurdle is a common feature and the prelude to the next step of repeating the new manoeuvre, of which she is rightly proud, ad nauseum. Latterly she has managed to climb up into her high chair and sit down,, so thinking this a bit dangerous I made sure the tray was in place to prevent this. This morning she negotiated this problem by climbing onto the settee beside the high chair and from there was able to climb in from the side and sit down with the tray still in place. She then cried to me as she no longer wished too be seated so I carried her down only for her to repeat the process thinking it all a game.
     As well as shoes and hello she is saying chair and has also added ball to her vocabulary. Even though she only has a limited number of words she understands far more than that. If she picks some rubbish up I can tell her to put it in the bin and she will do so. This follows on from the early morning routine when we come downstairs for breakfast. She insists on carrying the dirty nappy bag and as soon as I put her down at the bottom of the stairs she will put it straight in the bin. The other morning when she woke in our bed and we were both leaving it as long as possible before we had to get up she amused herself by grabbing for anything within her reach. Knowing that any more sleep was impossible I got up to find my slippers missing. I asked Bethany "Where's daddy's slippers?" and she immediately retrieved them from behind the curtains. Unfortunately this tactic has yet to succeed regarding the DVD remote.

A slab hymn lather

My posts have been slowing down of late to such an extent that I am probably going to put my other two on hold and just post on here for the time being as I seem to be quite busy currently. If I am honest with myself the news and sport blogs are just me mouthing off on certain topics and do not add anything to the debate and if I don't post anything for a few days I start to feel guilty as if I have an obligation to keep them updated. My verbosity does not help which is why I have started to make any pithy comments on either of my Twitter feeds where, if anybody is interested, have the advantage of brevity. When I had the time if I was feeling obliged to post I would trawl around for a relevant story on which to comment in a way that I had not heard already before writing something down rather than being inspired to comment after hearing something which was more the case at the start of the project.
   Ironically I got that feeling again today with the furore over Johann Hari but it's late and everything that could be said has been. However, there does seem to be a worrying trend of us and them in from the commentators where he has got a sympathetic hearing from those with similar liberal tendencies and an absolute pillorying from those on the right. Basically using old quotes is not great journalism and he should have been up front about his technique but it does not make him the scourge of Fleet Street (or wherever the Hell they are nowadays) and there are far worse columnists misrepresenting what people say. To be honest I was impressed that he had researched his interviewees enough to find previous quotes from them and suspect that other columnists would not have bothered. The anger directed at him from some quarters is over the top and I fear an American Fox News style media emerging where shouting and pointing fingers replaces debate. The more extreme elements there seemed to emerge under a right wing government almost as if they got too defensive justifying their actions and I hope it does not get that far over here. Any perceived faults in right wing commentators are more easily brushed aside as if we would not expect anything other from them but those on the left need to be holier than thou for fear of being labelled a hypocrite.
   I suppose I could have posted that on News Views after all but it may be easier in the long run to combine all my ramblings in this one place from topical events to sport to the quotidian which was how it started before I differentiated them as I felt I wanted to separate the personal details from my political thoughts. It is all part of who I am, however, and to continue the calculus theme it may be time to integrate.

Harm ant, bash, yell

At the start of the week returning home from night shift found me dangerously tired as I struggled to keep my eyes open but thankfully the last few shifts I was fine as I readjusted to that sleep pattern (just in time to reset my biological clock as that shift ends). Each morning, however, as I got home Bethany was asleep in our bed but laid perpendicularly to Alison so that there was no room for me. Having no choice but to turn her at right angles so that she is parallel between us she was sound asleep enough not to be disturbed by this manoeuvre each time I performed it. Within an hour she is usually up and this morning she announced the end of her slumbers by climbing over my head to try and switch on the bedside lamp.
   She continues in pursuing new activities and Alison has been colouring in with her with the intention of using one of her creations as a birthday card for Helen next week. Concern about leaving her with the sharp looking coloured pencils, especially as she has developed a tendency of trying to put things up her nose or rub her eyes with them we thought it safer her to get her some crayons. At the back of our minds we already knew where this was going to lead and sure enough no sooner had Bethany opened the tin of crayons she was using them to colour in the laminate flooring.
   This morning before Alison went to work she thought it a good idea to make some cakes with Bethany who remained completely disinterested by the whole experience and preferred to bang together her food bowls that were on the worktop. A small moment of worry came when offering her the bowl to lick out before remembering that the mixture contained raw egg. Bethany was not interested in eating it anyway although she was a little bit sick later on.
   We had to go into town to pick up the cake mix and crayons yesterday and in my tiredness I managed to confuse myself. Alison and Bethany left the house whilst I finished what I was doing before following them out and locking up. When I got outside I could not see them so thinking that I had locked them in I returned indoors and shouted for them. No reply and only me there puzzled me but going back out to the street I saw them coming back to the street after Bethany had evidently decided to start to walk down town. Being locked in was a familiar theme as I was trapped in the yard at work that morning between two locked gates. A delivery driver had spent the night in the yard and I went down to open the outer gate around 5am to let him out onto the road. About half an hour later he went so I went back down to lock the gate back up. I reopened the inner automatic gate from the inside, put the padlock on the outer gate and turned round only to find that the inner gate had been closed - controlled by the Gatehouse who must have noticed it open on the camera and rather than thinking that it had been opened for a reason just shut it. I resorted to phoning the office for the manager to come and let me out but as he came down the Gatehouse must have managed to make me out hidden as I was in my bright orange hi-vis jacket.
   In the town there was one of those human statues which I can't recall seeing in Darlington previously and who was pretty ridiculous. She was dressed as a bride with a painted white face and a parasol and as Alison disdainfully remarked "She's moving". The occasional movement did not bother me: what I found annoying was that she was sat down on one of the benches on high row. The first time I saw these "performers" was on Las Ramblas in Barcelona where the novelty and the stillness made them worth pausing to watch for a while and get a photo. I have not seen many seated statues but that is what we had on offer yesterday - a lass in a white dress having a sit down. Ironically around the corner a homeless man was sat in a shop doorway with a box in front of him as well and I found it hard to differentiate between the two. Being tired and now grumpy I walked passed both of them without giving either any change but felt guiltier for refusing the homeless man.

Bream shanty hall

I'm umming and ahhing. When I started my website I had a £50 voucher for advertising on Google and, whilst I was hardly inundated with requests, it is noticeable that I have not had an order since the voucher credit ran out. My problem is that I'm not very big on self promotion and in an ideal world would like to build a word of mouth situation helped along by Twitter and Facebook accounts to promote the site. As it's just me trying for a bit of pocket money to supplement our income I was averse to paying for more advertising when the site is not generating that much income in the first place - basing on how well the voucher performed £20 of ads may generate £30 -£40 income per month. Hopefully as the website became more established more orders would be placed but that leads to another fear: demand outstripping my ability to write them. This is more of a pipe dream - the thought that I would have to turn work away or even sub contract is incredibly unlikely. Seeing that the hits on my site have fallen right off and I got bored of trawling the pages on search engines means that I either bite the bullet and accept that I need to advertise or let the whole thing drift away for the remaining time left on the website. Much as I find the concept of advertising quite distasteful, for the sake of £10 or £20 I think I'll take some out and see what happens.
  
   Bethany now has almost a mouthful of teeth which have added a sibilant tone when she speaks. Her favourite word is still "Shoes" and she will now say "Yes" rather than the previous "Yeah". She is also continuing to climb everywhere, preferring the top of the coffee table to the floor where she will dance to any form of music - including my attempts at percussion on one of her toy boxes. She is also still enjoying a varied diet but is easily bored by the food on her plate (especially if it something she has had a few times previously) and would prefer to eat what is on our plate - even if it is the same food.
   I was impressed, however, by her ability to buy me some beer for my 2nd Father's Day if not a little concerned (or at least would be if I had not given Alison a lift to the shops the day before whilst Bethany and I waited in the car) but at least she scribbled in my card.

Than rashly blame

A shortened week at work (that's not over yet) but chewy that did not seem quite so important after a serious accident involving a tanker driver. The driver was delivering caustic and as he went to connect his tanker up got covered in it as it exploded in his face. The first I saw was when I passed to see him being attended to with bottles of eye wash just after being thrown under the shower. By all accounts his face was red and blistered and the worst case scenario first reports feared for his sight but thankfully that appears to be alright and after being taken to hospital he was later transferred to James Cook University Hospital but was reported as stable and had been released by today.
   The car park has not seen so much activity as ambulance men, police and health and safety officers milled around getting details and examining the CCTV footage. From what I gather he had not started pumping the caustic off but had simply removed the cap from the back. Not yet wearing his visor the valve must have been leaking and building up pressure behind the cap which then flew into his face as he removed it. Apparently he admitted his fault in not wearing his visor and supervisors at work are fearing reprisals for not ensuring that he was wearing his safety equipment which they are supposed to do but in reality everybody signs the paperwork and leaves him to it. On the face of it this may seem lax but the driver must, and apparently has, taken responsibility for his own protection provided he has been issued with the correct equipment and received the proper training. Whilst the onus of this will fall on his company it is not to deny our company any responsibility as they must inform him of any local rules which to be fair is generally the case.
   The trouble is that everybody is in fear of legal action and being sued or even prosecuted so seek to apportion blame. This has the knock on effect of people being wary of reporting accidents worrying about consequences which can only make things worse as people are more nervous and not concentrating on the job in hand. In the last few weeks there have now been a number of mistakes as the workload increases and people get tired working extra days which then creates a vicious circle.
   At least in this instance as bad as the accident was and the scars the driver may have it is slightly reassuring that it is not as bad as was first feared.

Thames ran by hall.

My mini holiday is officially over as I return to work tomorrow but I managed a few chores and caught up with a few DVDs I had not seen - replacing the last film in the drawer I found another I had forgotten I had still in the cellophane. That gives me something easy to watch rather than search again for the DVD remote or hide in another room to watch a box set.
   Alison at least enjoyed her concert although said that she felt unwell and had to be taken to First Aid after feeling faint where they checked her blood pressure and the like and found that her blood sugar was low. I teases that she had suffered from takethatmania but thankfully she seems a bit better now and it did not detract from her enjoying the show. She and my mam did say that the stewards were very helpful at the City of Manchester stadium as they asked where they could get some water and one offered Alison his own bottle and they guided her to the First Aid area.
   Despite the best attempts at clearing up bits of feather and other material of varying shades of pink are still dotted around the South Park as evidence of the Race for Life from the other day. Either that or some diseased textile flamingos have had a fight. Crossing the park I also noticed what looked suspiciously like one of Bethany's dummies in the approximate area where we had been sat but thought it best to steer her away from it. One of her dummies I did see is the one on the mud bank of the duck pond which she dropped out of her mouth the other week and is still nestled the other side of the fence by the water's edge. Along with those she manages to spit out down the side of the cot during the night and the rest that she hides in her "special place" we are fast working our way through them. Any credit we are gaining from improving the fortunes of dummy manufacturers and suppliers we are negating with the environmental impact of dumping half of these non biodegradable supplies in parkland.
   Still at least Bethany enjoyed herself in the park, talking to the ducks and chasing squirrels before playing on the swings and slide.